The notion of summing up my life during the past four decades to a group of virtual strangers has been daunting. First, I had to get past “do I even want to do this”? And then, if so, what to say, when to make time to write? Reading everyone’s stories has inspired me, but I confess to wanting to download my CV and leaving it at that.

Then I remembered a terrific school project my son did when he was 11 years:

a photo-biography of “My Mom.” Who is, of course, me.

I’ve attached a pdf of this interview he did of me, interspersed with news clippings, photographs, and his “Question Man” character who asked questions about my life. His interview covers a lot of turf: meanders through my childhood, my experiences at Columbia, my work, our family and other things of interest to an 11 year old boy.

So, now read: MY MOM by Jake Evans-(PDF)

Postscript

About me, my family, my work:

The organization, WHEDCo (www.whedco.org), that I founded in 1992 now has a staff of over a hundred people, operates a microenterprise network of home-based childcare-givers throughout the Bronx (where I’ve worked for the past 20 years); a Head Start Center, a commercial kitchen business incubator, youth after school and summer education/enrichment programs. We also develop and build affordable housing.

This spring, we’re in the middle of construction of one of the first multi-family affordable “green” buildings in the city (probably the country). Green building is fascinating, as it is a continually evolving field. And as the market for green building grows, so too will the demand for green materials and products that can be manufactured right here in the USA. No wonder the presidential candidates are talking about “green collar” jobs.

I feel fortunate that I’ve been able to create my own work, and organizations to house it, for the past 25 years. I think they call it “social enterprise” these days.

But the work has been demanding—growing a business (our annual operating budget is over $7 million not counting the housing), raising money, worrying about meeting payroll, and always thinking about being true to the mission, and the best at what we do.

Jake, author of “My Mom,” is one of my three “children.” He is now 24 years old, and was the adolescent from hell. My husband Roger (more about him in a minute) and I told each other in our darkest parental hours that if we could get him through adolescence he’d be a great adult. I’m proud and profoundly relieved that Jake has become a terrific young man: an environmentalist; an outdoor educator—he takes groups of young people on exotic expeditions: mountain & rock climbing, canoeing, and living in the backwoods. He knows wilderness emergency medicine; he loves to cook, and has the best taste in music (he had that even when he was terrible).

I’m married to Roger Evans, who is the Director of Public Policy & Litigation for Planned Parenthood Federation of America, where he’s been since shortly after Jake was born. We’ve been together, happily, for 25 years.

Before marrying Roger I had a brief marriage, which had as its only positive outcome the birth of my oldest son, Matthew, who is now 32 and in law school.

Matt spent his twenties being a Democratic Party “operative” and working on political campaigns all over the country. He finally tired of the roller coaster of endless campaigning and decided to get a profession. We all hope he’ll get a real job and make some money soon.

And then there’s my daughter: probably the most wanted daughter in the world, Lilias (Lily) who just turned 18. Lily has been the daughter every mother dreams of: brilliant, beautiful, centered, graceful, independent, funny. In September she’ll be going off to Carleton College. And I’ll miss her. She had absolutely no interest in applying to Barnard or Columbia.

Deciding to have Lily in a way sums up how I think I’ve lived my life since Columbia. I had just turned 40 years old, and Jake was six. I knew the biological clock was ticking, but I just couldn’t wrap my brain around the possibility of having a third son. And so I decided I couldn’t do it.

Time passed. I searched my soul; Roger and I talked. The ball was in my court.

I arrived at what I knew was the cross-roads; decision time. Then or never.

And what made me decide to roll the dice and get pregnant again was asking myself this question: Would I look back at my fear to take a chance with remorse? Would I regret not having the courage to take a risk? I realized that I had always chosen paths that entailed some risk, some uncertainty, some fear.

Things I love: music, dancing, cross-country skiing, yoga, swimming, being at the beach or in Vermont, reading fiction, travelling. Having a sister, Dana, living in NY and being a friend—and a niece too: Abby.

I’ve been a Bruce Springsteen fan for over 30 years- this year deciding to live the “groupie” experience, going from concert to concert- as many as I can afford.

What I wish for: that Barack Obama becomes the next President and perhaps we can dig this country out of the catastrophe that has been the Bush presidency.